Every day I come across women who are not happy, whether its my clients, friends, family or a story in a magazine or on Facebook. It saddens me to hear the lack of confidence some women have in themselves and at times I can see myself reflected in them: even at my slimmest, I still thought I was ‘fat’ and was still striving to lose weight. As women we constantly criticise ourselves and our bodies and place ourselves under enormous pressure physically and mentally. If this sounds like you then this weeks blog is right up your street! I’ve put together 9 simple ways for you to be kinder to yourself.
- Pay yourself a compliment
What we tell ourselves is what we believe. We all have ‘self-talk’- that little voice that acts as a running commentary on everything we do. For some people, our self-talk tells us we are useless, fat, can’t achieve anything…. This is negative self-talk. If you wake up every morning, look in the mirror and tell yourself ‘You are fat’ or ‘you look disgusting in that outfit’, you stop making an effort with your appearance and live up to the labels. When someone constantly puts us down, it whittles away our confidence and makes us feel we are no good. It’s actually a form of abuse. So why do we allow ourselves to do it to ourselves?!What would happen if you started saying nicer things to YOU? Eventually you might start believing it and eventually your confidence will start to rise again.
- Do something that is just for YOU
It’s not selfish to do things for you once in a while. Life has you running a 100 miles an hour, juggling work, family, social life and children. You spend every day giving, giving and giving. Eventually you will head for a burn out. Theres a saying ‘You cannot pour from an empty cup’. By taking care of yourself first, you will be better able to keep giving to others. Whether it’s you going to the gym once or twice a week or just escaping for an hour to read a book, make an appointment with yourself each week to squeeze in something that will boost your soul and energy. Don’t feel guilty for having that time. You deserve and need it.
- Make time for relaxation
Make sure you get some time to just relax and let go of anything that is stressing you out, even if only for 10 minutes whilst you have that cup of tea or half hour to have a soak in a candlelit bath whilst hubby watches the kids. Stress is one of the major impacts on our health, taking conscious steps to reduce it will be kinder to your health.
- Appreciate yourself
Taking time to reflect can help us recognise our achievements, giving us a boost, as well as making sure we keep doing the things that make us proud of ourselves. Look back over the last year of your life. Think about what you have achieved and what you are most proud of. APPRECIATE YOU. Don’t wait for others to appreciate you, go out and buy yourself that bunch of flowers, because you deserve it.
- Live a healthy lifestyle
You can nourish your body through nutrition and activities on a daily basis. For some this could be throwing yourself whole-heartedly into a new healthy lifestyle. Or it could be a simple as making the healthier choice when grabbing lunch on the go, or taking a walk in the sunshine with the kids.
- Learn to say NO
Women are known for their ability to multitask and are chronic people pleasers. If something doesn’t feel right to you, or if you or your relationships will suffer because of you taking on too much. SAY NO! It’s ok to know your limits and put your needs first. If something is going to harm you physically, emotionally or spiritually, politely but confidently decline.
- Forgive yourself
I bet I am not the only woman out there who has punished myself for mistakes that have been part of learning and growing. No-one is perfect, without mistakes there would be no lessons or successes. We have to try to be less hard on ourselves. Next time you make a mistake practice being a little less hard don yourself. Accept the mistake, evaluate what you can learn from it and use it to help you grow and move forward.
- Get rid of negative people
If you are constantly feeling rubbish around that one ‘friend’ who always brings you down, or feel uncomfortable every time you see negative Nelly’s facebook statuses, GET RID! Delete them from your life. Life is far too short to have someone make you feel low (you already criticise yourself enough remember lol). I can assure you, you will feel a massive weight lift off your shoulders. *off to do a facebook cull right now*
- Life your life intentionally
When you live with purpose, you will accept and love yourself more. Not everyone knows what their purpose is and you dont need to be crystal clear on it. Decide what your intention is. Is it to be happy? To live a healthy life? To be a good partner or good mum? To work your socks off and get a promotion? Whatever your intention is, make decisions that support it and this will make you feel good about yourself.
Love Natasha x